“Nothing happens to us that escapes God’s notice and care; not a tear falls to the ground that He does not remember. When we suffer, it is a great comfort to know that God is for us- everything that we live for will be put to use for our good”- AMP Bible study note for Psalm 56:8.

You have put my tears in a bottle. Are they not recorded in Your book?? (Psalm 56:8)

2017-2018 was an awfully intense year filled with experiences I never expected to live through…on many levels and for many reasons.

In a way, it was kind of a culmination of the past 10 years all smushed into one year!

All the lessons I had lived through pretty much came to the surface as I attempted to maneuver through each new situation as it came…

I am watching my Facebook memories and seeing the new posts of these last few days and can see the truth of this verse in its entirety.

Ten years ago, this week actually, my sister in law died from her battle with alcoholism. That single,intensely awful experience was the catalyst to transform me into the person I am today.

In that time, ten years ago, I was angry and despondent in my grief…but those unrelenting emotions of pain and despair turned into a passion to never let anyone walk alone in their pain ever again if I could help it.

Talk about the Lord using my tears and never wasting them!!

In a few weeks, after taking a hiatus due to my own need for self-care, I am pleased, honored, and humbled to return to the GriefShare table; offering assistance through my own experience of healing by Christ to those who are hurting.

( FYI: http://www.griefshare.org has listings of classes local to you as well)

That experience of received comfort from the Lord completely changed me and it is not something I can keep to myself!

I have learned and love the acronym for HOPE as something to hang onto and to pass on:

H hold

O on

P pain

E ends

To me that is epitome of purposeful living .. encouraging others to hold on BECAUSE pain ends…I desire to offer them the HOPE I now have.

This year, I see all the posts of high school graduates going off to college…and that is an overlooked yet extremely significant moment in the child’s life but also for the parent.

In our experience of 2017-2018, we found ourselves unexpectedly sending our own graduated high school student off to college…we are parents to much younger boys so this was not an experience we were emotionally prepared for in any way, shape, or form.

Saying “goodbye” and leaving a kid you love (whether by birth or not) was one of the most difficult things I had to do….except for returning home and learning how to live again as a family of 4 in the house.

I had a whole new appreciation for my own parents leaving me 2.5 hours away from home without the luxury of social media and cell phone instant communication!!!!

I wondered often, as I was yet again adjusting to a new normal way of living, why on earth am I going through this???

What is the purpose for this pain???!!!

I didn’t ask to be in this situation. I didn’t look to feel this “maternal” to one I didn’t raise. I never anticipated the experience of ten years ago would have led us to this place.

Yet there I was anyway.

What to do with it all??

Were those tears to be wasted?

No.

“Nothing that happens to us escapes God’s notice and care.”

A year later, I have a compassion and an insight to the heartache of a mother’s heart as her children leave the nest.

This is no simple transformation or transition of a home.

Behind the excitement in a mother’s smile is a heart that is hurting…it is inevitable because letting go hurts.

We have loved, cared for, and protected our children…and suddenly, in a blink, they grow up and move out.

I think I needed to learn that lesson…in preparation of my own son’s moving on soon-maybe…Or, perhaps, to have my eyes open to another mom who is forgotten in the shuffle of life and needs a little TLC herself.

There isn’t a single experience we go through that God can’t redeem,restore, or reuse for His Kingdom and glory…not one.

So, to the mom’s and dad’s who are sending their sons and daughters off into the world this week, I see you.

More importantly, the Lord sees you and every tear that falls to the ground.

To those who are experiencing deep grief because a loved one has died, I see you: Hold On Pain Ends.

More importantly, the Lord sees you and can use everything you go through for His good.